so this one time

i had a black eye and i told everyone a horse had kicked me.
cause what happened was, i was lying on the couch laptopping and i picked up the laptop with one hand for some reason and it fell on my head.

when i did stupid shit like that in NC i used to blame it on a sailing accident but here in SF the water is so flipping cold it would just lead to a lot of annoying questions. Nobody sailed in NC either hardly but here people would probably quickly cop to the fact that I haven't been sailing in 20 years.

oh the black eye happened when i was riding regularly so that at least made some sense. next time i trip over an imaginary snake I'll have to blame it on a homeless guy or something.